I still can't believe this!

As I write this blog everyone realizes the world is searching for answers to our pandemic crisis. I'm hoping everyone is practising all the recommendations set out by the Health leaders and government. I know we are and wanting to stay safe so we can once again join our jobs, family and friends. But I don't want to dwell on this topic this time. We are living it.

Those in my circle of trust know the issues I have had with my brother's estate and finalizing it. I am still struggling with a few last details and with the government agencies working from home I need to resign myself that nothing comes easy. Patience is a virtue. But let me tell you my patience is running thin.

But I wanted to share my journey recently regarding my brothers passing. Once I had finalized the house sale and paying outstanding bills I thought I would honour his passing with a headstone. My brother Bill who lives, eats and breathes our family history likes to see a clear headstone when he searches graveyards, it helps his search for answers.

I went to a local Monument maker (won't name who but its located on Foundry Street) and boasts being in business for over 100 years.(I'm not sure how, the smoke in that place is unbearable) We decided on a stone and I even had it placed in cement so it wouldn't sink into the ground. I had a ham radio put on it. Allan had made many friends over the air waves and it was his favourite pastime. I thought it was very fitting and was pleased I could get him this last one thing. Thought I covered all my bases.

Just the day before Christmas I received an email that the stone had been placed. I had a cheque made out by the lawyer to pay the last instalment for the headstone. But something told me to do my due diligence and go to my parents gravesite and check it out before paying. Well lo and behold there was nothing but an orange pylon sitting on site. I left the graveyard and called the monument company and they assured me it was installed and if I had any problems to call back. What call back, I'm trying to tell them its not there but was given the brushoff. I went back to the site and took pictures and sent them to my brother and husband asking if I was missing something.

The next day I went to the monument company with my pictures and the owner proceeded to complain about the town and the process he has to go through blah, blah, blah, When I first went to order the headstone he pulled up my parents headstone and so he knew where it was supposed to be. Remember they have been in business 100 years. lol but couldn't figure out the grave sites. He told me the town marked it with a pylon. Hello, but here is the pylon and no additional headstone.

I was seething inside but I left quietly not wanting to lower myself to his behaviour. He told me he would look at it the next day. I can't describe the letdown I felt and so I thought I would head down to the graveyard and try and find where they had placed the stone, in cement no less.(not an easy move) As I wandered around near the spot he described a black truck pulled up and it was the monument owner. I don't think he expected me to be there. I said where is the headstone and he pointed to where it was. I took a picture and then proceeded to show him where it should be placed. I never said anything but just nicely said "an apology would of been nice" he then let into me again about the town and him having to get so and so off their asses so I just walked away and got into my car. I sent the picture to my brother Bill in Calgary and he replied that we are related to the Campbell family where the headstone ended up. I felt some relief that Allan's headstone was with family. I can't imagine what the Campbell family were thinking if they visited their loved ones. A few weeks later I returned to find it at its final resting place but do you think they centred it with the other gravestone, no. Guess I wasn't specific enough. I didn't have the energy to fight another battle.

In the end I took the cheque and mailed it to the wrong address. Lesson learned monument company.


They got the cheque, a few months late but it would just delay my finishing up with the estate if I didn't pay and we can't have that.

Lesson learned: don't pay your bills until you have done your due diligence, one of the seven heavenly virtues. A belief that work is good in itself.

Comment if this has ever happened in your family or someone you know.

Thanks for reading!


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